Spanking and Discipline

spank1Some parents swear by it, but some swear never to do it. Which side of the fence are you on?

Parents of the yesteryears raised their children in a very hardcore fashion – spanking, scolding, yelling, punishing etc. Looking back, I can still remember vividly how my mother spanked me when I misbehaved. I felt humiliated and I betrayed. On some occasions, I didn’t even know why I was spanked and what I’ve done wrong. It was an isolating experience that made me feel angry at my mother.

I told myself spanking is absolutely not right. I’ll never do it to my children. Being all-out cruel with our children will not work in the long run. It will damage the bond with our children. I strongly believe that there are many gentle ways of disciplining our children besides spanking.

In a moment of anger, it is difficult not to yell or spank. I try my best to stay calm without losing control of my emotions. My father once told me, spanking can only make a child rebellious and aggressive. Once the pain is over, the child will forget and repeat his mistake. I guess he is correct.

Redirection technique still works well for me. Whenever Little Edison wants to reach for something inappropriate, I’ll redirect his attention elsewhere. Accepting the word ‘no’ can be extremely tedious for him, I have to be firm and consistent. After he calms down, I’ll explain to him the consequences of his actions. Most of the time, he will listen and nod his head.

Some peaceful parenting techniques that I adopt:
– encourage positive behavior
– express my feelings through words, not actions
– always use positive communication skills
– motivate my child through LOVE
– resolve conflicts in a peaceful way
– create a positive learning environment
– provide unconditional LOVE
– create a stress-free and enjoyable atmosphere for the whole family

To smack my little boy – it hurts my heart even more. So, why should I do it?

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