Work-Life Balance

Are We a Super Mom?

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel that being a working mom, I really don’t have any time to waste. To juggle a crazy work schedule, but also find time to nurture for her child while keeping everything else in her life afloat, it really takes a super mom to achieve that. Are we considered a super mom?

We are always on the go. In the morning, we drive our kids to school and then to work. After work, we fetch them home, prepare dinner, feed them, bathe them, read books to them and tuck them to sleep. When the kids are asleep, we start to make mental list of things to do and accomplish for the next day. On weekends, we have to arrange family outings, drive the kids to activities as well as enrichment classes. We never stop.

Few days ago, I came home after work feeling really tired. I was rushing for reports all day, with only fifteen minutes of lunch break in-between. I was determined to complete all my works and leave my office at 6pm sharp. Thankfully, I managed to meet my target.

When I reached home, I realized that Little Edison has been waiting for me to bring him for a walk. Although I was physically exhausted, I didn’t decline his request. Deep in my heart, I knew that this boy has been waiting for me patiently and he wants to spend some time with me. I brought him for a walk in the neighborhood.

Dinner was ready at 7pm. The helper tried to feed him while I had my dinner with Daddy V and my parents-in-law. That evening, he fussed a lot and refused to eat. My helper couldn’t do anything so I had to rush my dinner to take over the feeding. After dinner, I bathe him while the helper packed up. We returned to our home at 8pm.

After a shower, I sat on the couch and waiting to watch the 9pm drama. Little Edison came to me and he wanted me to do coloring with him. I sacrificed the drama. I did coloring with him, read books to him and tucked him to sleep at 10pm.

I went to bed half an hour later but I couldn’t stop thinking. A day has gone by, but there are hardly any minutes that can be considered just mine. At that instance, I felt so sorry for myself. Whether I’m stressed, annoyed or exhausted, I’ve learnt not to constantly bickering and complaining about Little Edison.

V always said that I should delegate more duties to our helper and I should get more rest when I’m home. He never quite understands me. I prefer to do things on my own simply because these are wonderful bonding times with Little Edison. I’m away from him during the day, but I want to do something for him when I’m home at night. My love for him outweighs everything.

Is this familiar to you? I’m sure all of us mommies faced with similar situation like this before. How do you cope? I love to hear from you.

 

6 Comments

  • Reply
    mico
    September 20, 2010 at 1:08 PM

    Hi,

    I guess we are in the same boat. Sometimes i will complain to my frens. i no longer living my life, but i live my life for my children. But i got this from a fren who has kids too. ” You may be losing ur personal time now, very soon, they will grow up and you have no chance to do what u r doing now for them, as they r independent and no longer require that much attention, then u will have lots of time for urself, it’s just a passing phase” . i tend to agree, like now, my girl no longer need night feed cos she has out-grow that so i have never have change to cuddle her to feed her at night and smell her like a baby.. haa.. but i still have to night feed my 7 month-old now.. soon i wont be doing it anymore. slowly, i wont even need to bath them cos they know how to do it themselves then.. and i bet i will be missing those tasks too.. true ?

    • Reply
      Emily
      September 24, 2010 at 3:59 PM

      Dear All,
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this subject. It’s been a super busy week for me. I finally have few minutes to log-in to my blog and reply to your comments. 🙂

      Mico – You have a good point here. Few years down the road, when they r all grown-up, we will definitely missed those tasks.

      Esther – Is it possible to have your dinner first before picking up your son from the nanny? At least, you can enjoy your meal and don’t have to rush and take big bites.

      Sam – Wow! 5pm is very early to me. Haha! I leave at 6pm. I miss your blog too, but I do understand the difficulties and time-constraint in maintaining a blog – especially when we change to a new job. All the best to your new career, and I can feel that you are enjoying it too. I saw the picture of your new office in FB. Very nice! 🙂

      MieVee – All the best to you too! Jia you to all mommies!

      Sabbymum – Climbing the corporate ladder and parenting are equally challenging. To achieve both, we really need a lot of energy & determination.

  • Reply
    Esther
    September 20, 2010 at 4:23 PM

    Everyday i am leading this kind of life. No helper or eldery to help me out. Dinner is a rush. Keeping an eye on this active toddler of mine, entertaining him while taking as big a bite as possible. Indigestion is my best friend now. 9pm show? I have not sit down and look at any tv shows eversince he is born. Yes, sometimes i do feel bitter and sorrowful. But what to do? This path is choosen by me. I remember once I was crying while going to fetch my son from my nanny after a day of hard work. Fatigue and depression came over me at that moment. Luckily only once. If you ask me whether to choose 9pm show over my son, my son still comes first. This is parenthood. At least until he is 18 years, maybe I get to read and watch tv again!

  • Reply
    Samantha
    September 20, 2010 at 8:57 PM

    Emily, I’m with you on this. As a FTWM, I chose not to delegate no matter how exhausted I am. The every minute counts…. My mum always say that I’m crazy to bring my kids out alone when my hubby is not in. She nags about my decision to leave the helper at home.
    I used to get upset or even flare at the slightest thing.. But not any more, the time I have with them is so limited.. Why shld I bother to even waste my time getting angry?? It’s not worth it!!

    And being new in the company, there’s so much to learn and manage.. I’m more exhausted than before. Like you, I strived to leave on the dot.. At 5pm for my case. These days, I don’t even blog that often if you notice. By the time, the kids go to bed.. It’s reconnecting time with daddy Heng before I crashed to bed. Haha

  • Reply
    MieVee @ MummysReviews.com
    September 21, 2010 at 1:50 AM

    I’m a SAHM and have abandoned TV-watching since son was born too. During his naps, I work part-time on my small writing business. Once he’s awake, activities surround him. Reading is a luxury during his 15-min water play / bath-time. But then, it’s either a book on parenting or polishing my business.

    Only when hubby returns from work do I get time to relax & shower. During weekends, family activities fill up. The only time I get to sneak out for me-time / pampering sessions is during visits to my parents’ (aka my-most-dependable-babysitters) place 320km away, once in several months.

    This is a path I choose for my son & future children. Just be strong and live through the phase. All the best to every mum! 🙂

  • Reply
    Sabbymum
    September 23, 2010 at 5:09 PM

    Havent been to your blog for awhile and you just worded my sentiments. A child defintely preoccupy your time 24/7. Being human I do gripe occasionally about not having any time for myself. And if I do have some time away, I always feel guility about it, isn’t it ironic? But I always focus on their love and need for me because soon that will pass and I will be missing it. So kudos to all the working mums specially those climbing the career ladder!

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