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motherhood

Everyday Things

Hard to Let Go

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Perhaps, the most significant change to me this year is waking up at this ungodly hour every weekday morning. Yes, it’s 5 plus in the morning. *yawn*

I set my alarm at 5:45am, but somehow, my system has adjusted to the new routine faster than I’ve expected. I usually wake up 5 to 10 mins before the alarm buzzes off. I don’t want to get back to sleep again, otherwise I will risk oversleeping.

After I shower and prepare breakfast for Edison, I wake him up at 6:15am. Within half an hour, he cleans up, takes his breakfast and change into his uniform. We leave the house at 6:45am. When we drive out from the carpark, the sky is still dark. *yawn again*

Many friends advised me to let him take a school bus, but I didn’t. First of all, I have to wake up extra early in order to send him to school. Having to face the traffic chaos outside the school was another. But the ‘mummy-ness’ inside me remains strong so I’ve decided to continue sending him to school every day. Just like what I’ve did for the past four years when he was still in kindergarten.

This routine is like a part of me now. I enjoy driving him to school. During the journey, we talk, we share and we laugh. I still enjoy carrying his schoolbag for him until the last point where I’m denied entry. And I’ll see him walking up the flight of stairs until he disappears from my sight.

My little boy. He’s all grown up now. It feels like each time I turn away, he grows a little bigger. He’s 7 years old this year, but in my heart, he’s forever a baby. There is always something in him that I can’t let go. I don’t know what it is.

V thinks that I’m too silly to think this way. He always reminds me that our boy will eventually grow up, chase his dreams and have his own life. What I can do now, within my capability and time, is to continue loving him as much as I can, protect him as fiercely as I can, train him and equip him with all the life skills as far as I can.

I’m unbelievably proud of my boy. Starting primary school is a big milestone in a child’s life, but he eases through it effortlessly. I hope that he will continue to enjoy school days in the many years to come.

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Click HERE to read all my posts on Starting Primary One series.

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