Real Mom’s Secret (Part 3)

Continued from Real Mom’s Secret (Part 2). Today, I’m going to share with you another three secrets of real mothering.

Secret # 4

We need to be a good role model and give our children an example that is worth copying.

In fact, the most important secret of real mothering is to recognize that our children learn by watching and listening. Our children witness how we react to stress and they mimic our actions. They hear how we speak, and they talk the same way to their peers. It is quite scary to realize how influential we can be in our children’s lives.

Having said that, our everyday life is like a text book to our children. What we model to our children everyday is far more important than all the enrichment classes, tutoring and flash cards. We need to recognize this important teaching tool of modeling and be aware of the tremendous influence they have on our children’s lives.

Secret # 5

We teach values and inspire characters.

Firstly, we must understand our family’s values as they are the foundation for how our children grow, learn and function in this world. It boils down to the philosophy of how we want to live our family life. From there, we develop moral codes for our children and we are always mindful of these codes and practice them ourselves.

By doing this, the real benefits to our children will be strong characters and a moral compass. These values will give our family a vision and a purpose.

Secret # 6

We support our children’s strengths and build their confidence.

Doscovering our children’s unique qualities and strengths is the most crucial parenting task. We need to learn to tailor our mothering to fit our children’s individual needs. We should be mindful that each child is different, and thus, we cannot assume that the same discipline approach to work on each child.

We must recognize our children’s strengths, natural talents and personality. The more we understand our children, the more effective we will be in our mothering.

It may be difficult to fully understand the concept of each secret by just reading the short description that I’ve written. In the book, Dr. Borba includes real stories from mothers that she interviewed during her research. After reading the stories, I can deeply understand the meaning and consequences of each secret.

If you’re interested, you can pick up this book from the public library and have a good read! I would highly recommend it.

Read all the posts on Real Mom’s Secret HERE.


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